I cannot even begin to explain the constant ache that will never be eased. There will never be anyone else for me. It is him or noone. He isn’t in love with me. He cares, but he’s not in love with me. I live with my heart in my stomach. A constant feel of sickness. There are no words to describe the pain I feel. My heart rebreaks a hundred times a day. I wish I could just be numb to it all, but that doesn’t work either. Finding destractions doesn’t work. Noone compares to him. I want noone else. Don’t tell me I need to rely on me for my happiness. I used to be happy, then I met him and I discovered a new kind of happiness, one that will only ever be reached with him at my side. I don’t know what to do with myself.
I cannot eat. I cannot think. I cannot function. And this is the life I lead.
